Traits

Traits

My life is normal. I live in a very normalized, balanced part of the world. I was born in a time and place where character traits are not measured. Rather, my worth is simplified into a value of economically valuable I am. Traits which would adhere to this principle are ones such as organization, time management, intellect and ability to work hard, regardless what the objective is. These traits are tested through high school and college, and following college I will be given a job that fits my placement in the ranks of others given how valuable my traits are. The higher ability I show, the higher my placement, and consequently a more comfortable living for my presumed spouse, our future children and I. So far, to my own standards, I have performed below my expectations but still above average in the country and world. And yet still, I am just a kid, who studied to get to where he is. My organization, time management, intellect and ability to work hard have proven above average. I have been tested throughout the four years in high school and this found myself where I am now. My organization is okay. I'd say it is above average. My time management skills are below average. My intellect is above average. My ability to work hard is highly dependent on the subject matter. For the most part, it is below average.

Then, are those four traits my worth as a human being? What I have experienced so far in life, I could easily assume so, if given the choice. But of course, I deny it and consistently tell others and myself that my worth far exceeds those four traits.

I find my worth in will. Mental fortitude. Discipline. The ability to fight for what you believe in. Fearlessness. Of course I do better in some categories than others, but my point is that I consider these traits far more important than the four given above. I consistently tell this story to others and myself.

But what of it? It means absolutely nothing to know my strengths alone. Even if I had all the traits I mentioned in full abundance, money and jobs, the two things that seem to determine worth in many people, does to come to me. Rather if I have the four traits of time whatever, then those would make it much easier to rise in a middle class economy. My life is not an anime, neither is it a movie. The traits which I adore so much are rarely tested to show standing in the world, and more rarely seen. There are no blatant moments where I showcase my will by physically dragging myself across the ground to live and die for the ideals I believe in. No. In this life, things happen normally, and if other people see those traits I might get a cookie.

Everybody has a certain amount of strength and fortitude innately built up within them. Some more than others. However to showcase those with the strongest strength and faith, the trails are tremendously painful and difficult. Simply said, I have never encountered such a situation. My middle class life does for heed for it. What could happen? First off, my family and all my friends could die. Maybe I could catch a terminal disease. Perhaps I accidentally kill someone. Perhaps even purposefully. But where is the adverse force? Where is the antagonist I could fight against? It would be absurd to tell someone to fight against death taking your friends and family. Or disease. It is possible, but there is no physical antagonist, nor do I feel like there is an achievable goal in life.

I've said before that I believe a human's primary goals in life are to love God and love others. It is simply not an entirely feasible goal. It's difficult with such an aloof and blanket goal to strive everyday for it, especially when it requires an amazing amount of selflessness. Of course, it still remains the goal, but I am simply stating that I was born in a time and place where they are tested in implied forms.

It's implied that everyone has a given amount of strength, because it is rarely tested. Trails and tribulations are rare in a middle class life. My life is not an anime. It is not a movie. It just happens and its average. Maybe.

I don't yet. Maybe I'm just waiting, preparing for my will to be tested.