random sad rambling post :(

random sad rambling post :(

You know

if we all died tomorrow

wouldn't we have all wasted our lives

when we could have made it so much more?

Sometimes I think people euphemize life

because they want it to become what they always thought it was

and it would be sad to think they are all living dreary lives, after all nobody want to admit it

everybody wants a life like a movie, but only few people live like that

But in what life constitutes, and what we do in it,

life is a melodramatic, boring scene

we all get kicks from the little things that happen

the little specks of glitter on an otherwise grey canvas

and all because we choose to

or maybe thats just what life is

and all the movies and entertainment seem to glamorize a life that doesn't exist

and we all chase after a watermark

and its even more messed up because to everyone else

it makes total sense that you live the first half of your life preparing for your second one

even in the sense that some doctors spend 25 years to be a doctor

and even in the sense of religion

and if you don't, and just have fun then you get screwed over later

like a harvest

and whats more even more messed up

in a totally stripped down, realistic sense

is that when we die

we will all either head to heaven or hell

when we hit heaven, we will not have any sense of regret

because it doesn't exist

and i don't even know how I feel about that, whether its good or not

and truly, none of our education, the things we spend most of our time on matter

i would think that i should have my life a different way

but why do i live my life the way i do right now, when i know in the future, i will not regret anything i do?

and for those of you who will go to hell

because sadly, there are many of you, even oblivious or stubborn as you may be

you will spend the rest of eternity in regret

even if you did live a fun and fulfilling life

and for those of you atheist

why do you even live

any life at all

having hope in a tomorrow, and only a tomorrow

having no guilt in what you do because you don't have to face a greater power

in the end, you are truly nothing

you exist, then you don't exist

imagine the moment you die

that's right, you can't

because you don't exist anymore

it's just a flash

its kind of ironic

life and afterlife are inversely related in a sense of how we live it

how we should live is actually rigidly defined

and yet

nobody lives that way

but even when you compare atheism and Christianity

everything is in the head

everything is subjective

life is what you make it

as much as i don't want to say it or explain the philosophy behind religion

the idea of a God is essentially created in your mind

but its like

once you seize the imagination

you realize something greater

and you don't need any proof

life is not meant to be understood

it's better that way

lalala i wish i could coherently convey my thoughts :/